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April 25 • 03:55
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Roland Garros 2016: Day One

May 24, 2016 | 06:19 AM

The second Grand Slam of the year has arrived, in all its soggy and chilly glory. Not much tennis was played yesterday, but there were some colorful moments between the rain drops.

The Tennis Channel, in its never-ending efforts to make itself relevant, is now airing a commercial that has Tracy Austin, clad in a tight-fitting blue dress, shimmying in front of a tennis net. I've tried to wrap my mind around this add, but I keep coming up with the words, "cringe-worthy." Tracy is a dignified champion, why would she agree to do that piece?

As if that wasn't curious enough, there is another commercial with Lindsay Davenport in a what's supposed to be a black cocktail dress standing in front of the same net, extolling the virtues of the TC. Why aren't Jon Wertheim and Justin Gimelstob, dressed in jockey shorts doing the same thing?

After only 3 minutes, I was muting the sound on my TV because the exchanges between Martina Navratilova, Mary Carillo and Brett Haber were annoying. Mary cannot let anyone finish a sentence, Martina is uber- critical of anyone who isn't herself and Brett is the goofy moderator who tries to keep the whole thing moving along. And we have two more weeks of this…..ugh.

Brett is sporting a cool pair of blue striped socks underneath his business suit. You can see them because he sits on his TC couch , legs crossed and arms folded. Sit up and put your feet on the floor, Brett. This is not your living room.

Speaking of Martina, her comments on Nike Kyrgios left me scratching my head. Nick, as usual was behaving like a spoiled lunatic. Chair umpire Carlos Ramos issued him a warning after he felt Nick barked at a ball kid. Of course Nick took offense to that, because in his mind, he NEVER warrants any of the negative attention that comes his way. Instead of owning his bad behavior, Nick did what any typical narcissist would do and pointed out what someone else had done prior to his episode, "When Djokovic pushed the line umpire out of the way, he gets nothing." Of course he added several colorful adjectives to his rant. Martina felt that Nick merely needs a "little guidance and direction" from a strong coach to help his behavior improve. Wrong, Martina. In my opinion, what Nick needs is so beyond that. That young man needs therapy. He is beyond reprimanding and trying to rewire years of bad behavior that have been enabled by his parents and handlers.

Mary Carillo "affectionately" refers to Garbine Muguruza as "The Goo." I want to vomit.

The commentators made a huge deal of the fact that Novak Djokovic made a half hour appearance at the French Open's equivalent to the US Open's Kid's Day. Apparently he wore a beret and painted on a thin mustache. The commentators said they hoped that this appearance by Novak would make people aware of the really great guy that he is. Well, maybe it will, but people aren't enamored with Novak because of something that he does. Personally, I've never warmed up to him because of something intangible about the way he acts. When he made those Neanderthal comments about women following the Ray Moore fiasco, he lost me entirely. Remember when Ivan Lendl had no fans? Remember how everyone kept saying that he was really a funny and great guy underneath the grim and business-like exterior? Well, as it turns out, they were right- he is engaging with a great sense of humor. No doubt Novak is as well. Let's hope we don't have to wait until he's retired to find out.

Jack Sock obnoxiously screamed his way to a victory in his rain-delayed match. The French fans booed him, showing him why it's never a good idea to be overly-demonstrative and especially at the French. The French fans can be brutal.

Petra Kvitova nearly lost in the first round to Danka Kovinic. She was two points away from packing it in, when she ripped a backhand up the one for a winner that t barely landed on the line. That took guts. Kvitova is one of those head-scratching anomalies- really good but never able to get it fully together.

Here's hoping that the sun makes an appearance at the French soon….Allez!

by LizStockton

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